Q: Overall, our Forum gets along great…but we don’t know how to address conflict. We avoided a conflict last year and we lost a member over it. I sense another conflict brewing. Is there anything we can do proactively to address it? ?
– Ramone T.
A: Conflict—and not knowing how to navigate it—can threaten Forums that seem strong and healthy from the outside. You’re doing the right thing by proactively addressing it!
You and your fellow members can harness the conflict to help your Forum grow and trust each other even more than you already do. The key is meeting conflict with curiosity instead of fear. Conflict doesn’t have to be scary. It can actually be productive.
Here are a few tips:
- Everyone should agree to hold what’s shared in confidence. Addressing conflict head-on won’t work without a safe environment where people feel safe being vulnerable.
- Go slow. Conflict causes us to react quickly, but that’s usually unhelpful. Slow down and deliberately move beyond what you know so that you explore the conflict.
- Focus on healthy conflict. Healthy conflict is “you and me vs. the problem”, while unhealthy conflict is “you vs. me”.
- Discuss your experience instead of your emotions. Productive conversations get derailed by judgment. Leaning on your actual experiences removes that judgment so the other Forum members can better understand you.
Putting conflict out in the open can really enhance your Forum’s depth, connection, and overall experience. For more guidance, check out this publication or email Elena@ForumSherpa.com for a complimentary 30-minute consultation with one of our facilitators.
– Matthew